Michal's Week 7: Vegan Special

The Vegan special was a unique challenge, especially because Michal was drunk whilst raping his food. But, nevertheless, he prevailed with a strong outcome with the ingredients had was given.

Michal's ingredients included:

- Dried Mushrooms

- Orange Juice

- Tortilla Wraps

- Pineapple

- Salted Peanuts

Michal began by pouring the orange juice into a pot and throwing some dried mushrooms in there and simmered them. He aimed to soften the mushrooms with the orange juice. He then cut the pinapple into round slices and placed a slice each on a tortilla wrap. He then folded the wraps as best as he could to try and mimic the round shape.

He drained the mushrooms and placed them in a drunken systematic order on top of each tortilla wrap and placed the wraps into the oven on 150 degrees for 10 minutes.

Once the wraps were warm and the mushrooms dried up (only a little bit), it was ready to be served. Michal hand squeezed pineapple juice over the top of the wraps (but only a smidgen).

He then proceeded to crush some peanuts in a plastic bag by smashing the shit through them with a hammer. He also successfully annoyed his housemate who was trying to watch master chef. WIN!

He sprinkled the peanuts over the top and the drunken mess was ready!

To be honest, it didn't look bad at all and it looked fantastic once it was cut. The pineapple looked amazing in the middle! For presentation, Michal received a 7.5. Creativity was an odd score to pick, it definitely won points with boiling the mushrooms in orange juice (as fucking odd as that was) and with the overall idea. Michal received an 8 out of 10 for creativity. Taste was another odd one to choose. The fact that it was so damn abstract and still edible, won it a score of 7 out of 10. Therefore, Michal finished on a decent note at the end of week 7 with a score of 22.5.

Boof's Week 7: Vegan Special

This week, each Rapist must buy 5 vegan ingredients, which were then drawn out of a hat. From said hat, Boof recieved: delicious felafel, tasty creamed corn, surprising multigrain Weetbix, amazing cherry tomatoes, and unusal rice wine vinegar.

After hours of deep thought, Boof decided to forgo creativity, and go for taste, as he was still dazed from last week's ordeal.

So, after carefully making sure that the oil was vegan, he fried up the crumbled felafel, then chucked in some rice wine vinegar. Next, the tin of creamed corn went into the pan, making it look like some freaky industrial experiment gone wrong. Then, the tomatoes were diced, and chucked in the pan as well. Boof cooked this mess up for a minute, then spooned it onto some Weetbix, and warmed the whole mess up in the oven.

Overall, it didn't look too bad, in a vomit-piled-on-weetbix kind of way. 7 for presentation. Creativity was settled on a solid 8. The taste portion of the testing was the most surprising. This shit actually tasted good! Though it was ridiculously dry, it tasted alright. So alright, in fact, that both Rapists spooned some mixture into one of Michal's tortillas, with some sweet chilli sauce and cheese.


All up, Boof walks away with a solid 22 for week 7.

Week 6: Holiday Special

FoodRape 2010 Holiday Special Rules:

Both Rapists must be shitting-on-the-neighbour's-lawn drunk.

Both Rapists must only prepare dessert.



So after several hours, a fire, public nudity, three dead hookers and too much beer, the boys decided to stumble home for the FoodRaping of their lives.

What follows may or may not have actually happened (we're a bit sketchy on the details), but we are pretty damn certain that these events have taken place.

Michal's 5 ingredients included cinnamon, rice, peanut butter, a chocolate Big M and scotch fingers. He ended up cooking the rice in the Big M, with cinnamon sticks. Once it was gooey, he spread the peanut butter on the biscuits, and dipped them into the rice.

And then Boof proceeded to begin his dessert. His ingredients included Atkin's Diet Chocolate, diced pineapple, strawberries, crumbed walnuts and coco pops.

What Boof and Michal didn't realise, was that the Atkin's Diet Chocolate wasn't your average chocolate.

We have since come to the conclusion that they were tainted with a foul black magic, from the infernal plains of Assunder.

As soon as the chocolate began to melt in the saucepan, a horrible odour filled the room, and black tentacles shot from the stove. Michal bravely replaced his underwear. Upon his return to the kitchen, he found Boof in mortal combat with the beast, a foul tentacled pedophile

from the depths of Hades. Michal cried out, and found that his voice was young and girly, and his testicles had receeded into his body.

"He's turned us into children!" cried Michal. "Quick, protect your orifices!"

The demon pedophile let out a terrifying giggle, and reared up to attack.

Michal and Boof glanced at each other, and sprinted for the laundry door. The beast's giggles followed them up the street.

Around the corner and across a few blocks, the boys found a panther sitting in the gutter, sobbing quietly to himself.

"What's wrong?" they asked him.

"My wife has been beating me on a daily basis for the past two years. Then the other day, I found out that she's been sleeping with Frank Walker from National Tiles this whole time. You know that cunt, does those fucking annoying ads on the radio. So now I want to stab her, and cut her heart out, but I don't have any thumbs, and can't hold the knife. I don't know what to do."

"We'll help you," said Boof.

"Yeah, we can hold knives," agreed Michal. "We don't even need adult supervision!"

"Really? You boys would help me kill my wife?"

"Of course we will! Though we need some help with a problem of our own."

Things get hazy around this point, though we both remember bleaching our shirts to remove some strange dark stains.

The panther help up his end of the deal. He shaved himself bald, and knitted them fake beards and body hair.

Once the fake hair was worn, both boys looked like bears.

Michal and Boof snuck back into their house, wearing their bear costumes. The beast pedophile assumed that this was normal behaviour for bears, and was oblivious as to their true identities.

Doing their best bear imitation, Michal and Boof carefully filled the kettle, and waited for it to boil.

The pedophile took no notice, concentrating on the K-Mart catalogue left on the bench.

Once it had finished boiling, Boof and Michal carefully used the kettle to beat the demon pedophile in the dick.

The pedophile let out a horrible scream, and burst into flames

His terrible kiddie-fiddling days were over.

Boof and Michal awoke, awfully hungover, to find that three weeks had passed, and that their desserts were missing.

If you have seen either or both of these desserts, please call Crime Stoppers on 1800 333 000.




One question remains: How the fuck did that fucking panther shave himself, and knit two bear costumes out of his own fur, if he didn't have fucking thumbs??

Boof Week 5 Exam Special: Lucky Dip

The Exam Special continues, with the $5 budget, and the obligatory Mi Goreng. The twist is that all 10 ingredients go into a hat, and the boys choose 5 ingredients at random. From out of the hat, Boof pulled:

A milky bar
Sweetened Condensed Milk
Macaroni and Cheese packet mix
and
ANCHOVETTE.

For those of you who don't know what anchovette is: it is a sandwich spread made from mashed anchovies. It smells and tastes awful. And it looks like catfood.

So at first, Boof was stumped. To get ideas, he experimented with putting anchovette and sweetened condensed milk on toast; it was bad. So, Boof refined the idea, and came up with something eerily similar to Michal...

Boof made the packet pasta as per the directions; 1 cup of milk, 1/4 cup of water and a teaspoon of margerine, all in a saucepan to boil. However, Boof mixed the Mi Goreng flavouring and .00652 of a gram of anchovette into the water, which then went into the saucepan. While that was boiling away, Boof buttered two slices of bread, and put them under the grill; butter side up. Once the bread had nicely toasted, he flipped them over, and poured sweetened condensed milk over the top. At this point, the pasta started to stick to the pan, so Boof turned down the heat, and stirred it for a bit. He then noticed a burning smell coming from the grill.

The bread was fucked. Burnt to a crisp, and the sweetened condensed milk looked like burnt cheese. Taking a leaf from Michal's book, Boof put some butter in a frying pan, and cooked up the bread that way. The difference being, of course, that one side of each bread slice had a generous portion of condensed milk poured over it. Boof removed the bread from the pan just in time, burning his finger in the process. The pasta went on top. The final touch was the milky bar, which Boof sliced in half, and placed on top of the whole lot.

It didn't look too bad. Kind of average. The milky bar gave it an added cool touch though. A 7/10 was decided for presentation. For creativity, a 8/10 was awarded. Chocolate, condensed milk and cheesy mac? It couldn't possibly taste any good, right?

Wrong.

It tasted awesome. On its own, the pasta was way too salty (owing to the Mi Goreng flavouring), but when combined with the sweet toast and white chocolate, it was superb. It was still a little salty though, so an 8/10 was decided for taste.

This gives Boof a score of 23/30 for the week, and an overall score of 103/150.

Michal Week 5 Exam Special: Lucky Dip

Boof and Michal decided to continue with the Exam Special tradition in week 5 considering that exams are still on at Deakin University. This week we thought that we would try something different once again. This week, we utilised the $5 student budget for the ingredients and then both Boof and Michal wrote the ingredients on small pieces of paper and put them into a hat.

Lucky Dip!

This week, the ingredients Michal had to use were:

- Mi-Goreng

- A Pear

- Baby Capers

- Mint

- Brown Onion Gravy

Michal proceeded to boil the Mi-Goreng noodles, completely discarding the flavouring. He boiled water and mixed the brown onion gravy mix and whisked it until it thickened. Michal then let this gravy set for a little bit in a bowl. He began melting butter into a frying pan and then fried two pieces of bread. Once the bread was ready, he placed it on the plate, mixed the noodles in together with some baby capers and the brown onion gravy until it was one thick shitty stew looking spew. And then placed some of that on the toast and it was ready.

For dessert, Michal cut the pear into three pieces: from small to large. He then proceeded to spread some sugar over the pieces and placed it in the oven at 250 degrees. After 15 minutes, Michal took the pieces out and made tower out of it. He then sprinkled some mint over the top of it and served it up. The sugar had melted really nicely and had caramelized over the pear pieces.

This week, Michal scored a 7 out of 10 for taste. Essentially, the main meal was mediocre. It wasn't anything special, the toast tasted nice but the rest of it was... well it was... "meh". The dessert on the other hand, was absolutely amazing! It caramelized perfectly and the mint was an amazing touch! Presentation, once again, the main meal was mediocre but the pear was once again smashing, bringing Michal a 7 out of 10 for presentation. Michal was lacking in creativity this week, Both him and Boof agreed that Michal should receive a 6 out of 10.

This brings Michal's total for the week to 20 out of 30.

His running total is 113/150

Michal Week 4 Exam Special

For our Exam Special, we had to buy each other 5 ingredients with a budget of only $5 (true uni value). One of these ingredients had to be a packet of Mi-Goreng because we decided that all uni students love good ol' Mi-G.

This week, Boof bought Michal:

- 6 pack of English Muffins

- Mi-Goreng

- Condensed Creamed Mushroom Soup

- A Potato

- A Cherry

This week, Michal got a break, the ingredients that Boof had presented him were easy, not as fucking weird as a fucking coconut or fucking a parsnip....... Fuck.... Michal began by pre-heating the over to 180 degrees. He then emptied the contents of the condensed mushroom soup into a pot and began slowly cooking it. Over the course of the cooking period, he would pour some water and some soy milk to make the soup more soupy. He also added a touch of salt and some pepper to it. It failed in the end anyway. He took the potato and thinly sliced half of it into thin round pieces and cut the rest of it up into fries. He placed cooking oil into a frying pan, some pepper and a touch of salt and fried the potato chips and slices up.

He then took two english muffins and cut them in half. He then took two halves and cut a circle out of them in the middle. He spread Philidelphia cheese on the other halves and placed all of them in the oven to warm up. He took the Mi-Goreng Noodles and boiled just the noodles. Once the fries and potato slices were ready, he took the potato slices and placed them on top of the two halves of english muffin which had the Philidelphia cheese spread on it. He then placed the boiled noodles (once he strained them) and on top of the potato slices and poured a little bit of tomato sauce on top of that. He then placed the other two halves which had the holes cut out of them on top of that to make a burger looking thingy. He poured a swirl of tomato sauce on that and placed them back in the oven to warm up (Michal called them boobs because they looked like boobs).

Following me camera guy?

He took another english muffin and cut it in half. He took one half and spread it with butter and also placed it in the oven so that it could warm up and melt. Once the soup had cooked, he served it in a bowl and used the aforementioned muffin as dipping bread.

Now for desert. Michal used the two round patches that he cut out of the english muffins and put them into a frying pan with some butter. He fried them up until they were crispy. He then placed htem on top of each other with honey in the middle and placed the cherry on top of that. Desert!

All up, Michal's dish had a lot going on. He was able to use the english muffins three times in three different meals. He served the main with those boob burgers and fries. The dipping bread was placed on the same plate, the soup was put in a seperate bowl and then desert was on its own. Loner...

It was a unanimous decision that Michal's presentation was outstanding (for a N00b) and he scored a 9 out of 10 (Both Boof and Michal liked the boobs... burgers). Boof believed that Creativity was once again an essential factor in Michal's cooking. Michal scored an 8 out of 10 in that field. Now the fun part... TASTE! Michal tried the soup, and automatically declared it a fail. It was pathetic... He can't make soup to save his life. The Boob burgers on the other hand were surprising, they tasted interesting (in a good way), unique in texture and looked very sexy. The Desert was also quite nice for a pompous little thing. All up, for taste, Michal got a 7 out of 10.

This gives Michal a 24 out of 30 for Week 4 Exam Special.

Total running score thus far for Michal is 93/120...

What will next week hold?

Boof Week 4 Exam Special

"REVENGE IS BEST SERVED IN A SMALL GREEN CAN"

For this week's FoodRape Exam Special, Boof and Michal had to buy each other $5 worth of ingredients, one of which has to be a packet of Mi Goreng.

Michal bought, for Boof,

A potato
Mi Goreng
A mango chupa-chup
A tin of tuna

And

A can of V.

Yes, V. The energy drink. Michal's revenge was at hand. Coconut, squash and parsnip had nothing on the sweet, tangy liquid contained within this small garish can.

Boof was fucked. He had absolutely no idea. At all. V? What the hell is this? I don't know what to do with V! Boof's first thought was to make V mashed potato. But, that was too close to Milo mashed potato. So, he went out on a limb.

Grabbing an extra potato, Boof sliced the potatoes into thin chips. He poured the V into a small frying pan and a large frying pan. The chips went into the big frying pan, and the tuna went into the small frying pan. The idea was that, once all the V had boiled off, Boof would be left with V infused tuna and chips. This didn't really work however, so once all the V had congealed into a syrup, Boof added some oil to the chips, to get them crispy.

For the dessert, Boof broke up the noodles, and discarded the Mi Goreng flavouring. He used his phone-a-friend, and asked Michal how to best crush the chupa-chup. so with a hammer and tea towel, the mango lolly was promptly pulverised. The noodles and mango powder went into a mixing bowl, with a mixture of milk and Blue Heaven topping. Then, into a saucepan on the stove until the milk started to boil. Then it went into a bowl, and in the fridge.

The resulting meal was foul. The chips turned out to be intriugingly awful, but Michal could not stop eating them (except for the burnt ones). The tuna actually tasted alright, except for the disgusting after-taste that nearly induced vomiting. Boof wasn't game enough to try the blue noodles, and Michal was speechless. The look on his face told the story though. It was eventually decided that Boof would get a 2/10 for taste, because the chips were addictive, and the tuna wasn't actually that bad until you stopped eating it. Presentation wise, the tuna looked like cat-food, the chips were black and sticky, and the dessert looked like someone had eaten blue fairy floss, then chucked into a bowl. A 2/10 was decided for the presentation, because the noodles were a pleasing blue colour.

Creativity wise, Boof and Michal decided on a 9/10.

So all up, Boof gets a 13/30 out of 30

Boof's running total is 80/120 at the end of Week 4.

Michal Week 3

We apologies for the late Week 3 for Michal as he was incredibly unwell last week and was not able to rape his food as per usual. Even though it is week 4, Michal was able to catch up on his food raping as his needs were not met during his time off. The ingredients Michal had to cook with was:

- Can of Kidney Beans

- Squash x3

- Parsnip x2

- Large Bag of Doritos Corn Chips (Cheese Supreme Flavour)

- Cottage Cheese

These ingredients had baffled Michal as he has never used parsnip before in his life nor has he even ate a squash. This called for some much curious exploration. Trial and Error... After tasting the squash and parsnip (raw = yucky), he then continue with his brainstorming of what the fuck he could do with these ingredients.

After much thought, and a tear or two... Michal began creating this weeks foodrape meal. He started by pre-heating the oven to 200 degrees and picking out the larger Dorito chips and placing them carefully on a pizza pan. He then placed small squares of cheese on each chip. He then thinly sliced his squash and placed one slice on top of the chip and the cheese.

Michal then proceeded to wash the parsnip (it looked dirty) and shave small strips of parsnip. He then placed a matchstick size piece of cheese on top of the squash and placed one shaved piece of parsnip on top of that. Finally, he placed another match stick size piece of cheese on the very top, essentially creating a tower of ingredients balancing on these chips (chode tower).

He placed these chode-like chip towers into the oven and let them bake (soon realising that 200 was maybe too hot so he dropped it down to 150.

Once they were in the oven, Michal grabbed 3 tablespoons of cottage cheese and put it into a small bowl. He then diced a tomato into small pieces and mixed that into the cottage cheese. He grabbed two tablespoons of kidney beans (without the disgusting fucking juice water shit) and also mixed them into the cottage cheese. Because we don't have a blender, Michal thought he would improvise and grabbed two knives and started stabbing the mixed cottage cheese, breaking apart the kidney beans and tomato. Once it was all mixed together nicely, he placed some rocket leaves as garnish and put the bowl in the center of the plate.

He took the chips out of the oven and let them cool down a bit, placing them around the bowl. He cut a small chunk out of a squash and stuck it onto the side of the bowl. He was finished.

Much to his surprise, the dish was not a complete failure. First of all, the presentation of the dish was amazing. Both Boof and Michal agreed that the presentation would score a 9 out of 10. Creativity was unanimously decided on as being scored an 8 out of 10 as it was different and unique in its own way, there could have been room for something that bit more. Now the scary part.... taste... Michal tasted it first and did not die. Boof soon followed suit. It was amazing to think that this dish.... tasted good.... Like.... What the Fuck?... So far no food poisoning nor any deaths. Success... Michal scored 7 out of 10 for taste.

This leaves Michal with a total of 24 out of 30 for Week 3.

After week 3, Michal is at a total of 69 out of 90. He gets the sexy number... for OBVIOUS reasons.....

Boof Week 3

Due to Michal's irresponsible tomato sauce binge last night (he snorted it), he is too sick to get Boof the Ultimate Challenge Ingredient, or even to Rape tonight. Thus, he will have to Double Rape next week.

But, in his tomato sauce induced delerium, he did manage to procure for Boof:

Banana chips
Turkish Pide bread
A Continental Cucumber
Brocolli
&
Eggplant






Boof was at first quite stumped. He thought of maybe making a Turkish style char-grilled vegetable thing with banana chips. But then he had a better idea. In anticipation, the oven was pre-heated to way-too-hot.

He cut the turkish bread in half, and then in half again. He now had two pieces of turkish bread, cut in half. He used last week's Garlic and Roasted Onion tomato paste and shredded mozzarella to make a base, on which he stacked the banana chips, diced eggplant and cucumber slices. This was then coated with more cheese, and a couple sprigs of brocolli were delicately placed on top.
Boof then bunged the whole thing on some trays in the oven, and turned it down to a reasonable 200 degrees celcius.

And waited.

And nearly waited too long, because he didn't realise that it only takes 10 minutes to cook a pizza at 200 degrees.









They looked fantastic! The colours, the crispiness, the everything!


And it tasted as great as it looked! Well, it was a little bland. But the banana chips were not disgusting, as Boof thought they might be.


All up, Boof gets a 7/10 for creativity, a 9/10 for presentation, and a 8/10 for taste!

This picks Boof's score up to 67/90.

POSTPONING WEEK 3

Due to unforeseen getting-beaten-ups, FoodRape 2010 Round 3 will be postponed till later this week. Like, Thursday or Friday. Or something.


Stay tuned!

Week Two (Boof)

The ingredients which Michal bought for Boof were: Tinned Spaghetti, Bacon, an Onion, Walnut & Ginger Cheese, and Sultanas.

Boof used margerine to grease a muffin tin, and lined it with bacon. He diced the remaining bacon and onion, and mixed it with the tinned spaghetti, with shredded tasty cheese. This mixture was placed in the middle of the bacon cups, and the whole thing was placed in the oven. The remaining mixture was heated over the stove, with pepper and a tiny bit of tomato paste added for taste. Dessert was diced walnut & ginger cheese, with sultanas and pure maple syrup.

One of the bacon cups worked perfectly; the other three didn't work. Boof spread the four bacon cups around the plate, and poured the remaining spaghetti in between. Rocket was sprinkled over the top, to make it look not-awful. The dessert fared better however; although no-one like the walnut & ginger cheese except for Boof.

In the end, Boof recieved a 7/10 for creativity; this is because Michal would never have thought of making bacon cupcakes. In the end, however, it turned out to just be fancy tinned spaghetti. Another 7/10 was awarded for presentation, because the dessert looked pretty cool, and the one bacon cupcake looked fantastic; but the rest looked like vomit.
Finally, a 7/10 was awarded for taste. The spaghetti, despite being merely fancy tinned spaghetti, was great. Despite this, it was merely fancy spaghetti. And, no-one liked the cheese which Michal had bought.
So Boof gets a 21/30 for the week.

In total...

Boof is on a total of 43 out of 60

Michal is on a total of 45 out of 60

Close Game!

Week Two (Michal)

In week two, Michal felt the repercussions of presenting Boof a tin of Milo in week one. This week, Michal was presented with the challenge of using Garlic and Roasted Tomato Paste, a Can of Minted Peas, Sweet Chili Philly Dip, Basil and Rosemary Vegie Sausages and a Fucking Coconut... A FUCKING COCONUT!... .... ... ........

Firstly, Michal decided that he would need some special kitchen utensils a.k.a the tool bag from the boot of his car. Michal firstly used a screwdriver and a hammer to poke a hole in the coconut to retrieve the milk. Much to his (and Boof's) surprise, there was no milk... Shame... He then proceeded to beat the coconut with a hammer for a minute until it cracked roughly in half. He took the smaller half and stabbed it with a knife for a couple of minutes to extract some of the inner coconut or coconut guts. He then gathered those guts and grated them and placed the gratings into a bowl.

He proceeded to cut up his Veggie sausages into smaller pieces and fried them in the pan. While it was frying, he put a dash of salt, pepper and surprise herb (no idea what it is). Once the sausages were almost cooked, he threw two handfuls of minted peas into the frying pan in the hope of lightly frying them and retaining some of that taste and getting rid of some of that disgusting stupid minted taste (Michal hates Minted Peas). He then put two tablespoons of Sweet Chili Philly into the bigger half of the Coconut piece and put some grated coconut over the top of the dip. He then put a small amount of un-fried peas on top of the dip to really add some colour. He then placed the peas and sausage on the place, placed the coconut bowl with the dip on the place and then put the tomato paste on the side of plate. It is there to mix with the peas to once again, abolish some of that harsh minted pea taste.

Overall, Michal scored an average score this week, slightly less than his first week. For Presentation, Michal's scored 8. The use of the coconut was a very nice touch, there was plenty of colour and it looked quite intriguing. Michal scored a 7 out of 10 for creativity. The reason being is purely because of the way he utilised his ingredients without using any other ingredients to add to the meal. Finally, Michal received a 6 out of 10 for the taste. The minted peas tasted like ass no matter what you did to it, the sausages were great and the sweet chiliy philly dip with coconut was another surprising combination. It seems that Michal has been able to successfully combine odd ingredients two weeks in a row. Michal finishes week 2 with a score of 21.

So far, Michal is up to 45 out of 60 points.

Week One (Boof)

Today, Boof was presented with his 5 ingredients, as chosen by Michal. His ingredients included 3 Dirty Potatoes, 1 Avocado, Pancake Mixture, a Tin of Milo and Feta Cheese. An interesting challenge and we shall see what he is able to come up with.

First, Boof washed and peeled two potatoes, then left them on the stove to boil. The last potato he washed, peeled and grated. He mixed the avocado and grated potato in a fry pan, with some oil, and fried it slowly.
Once the potato was semi-crispy, Boof combined the pancake mix, potato and avocado in a bowl, and then poured it into the frying pan. By this time to potatoes were done, and he mashed the potato up with some milk and a soup spoon of milo. However, he used too much milk, so put the whole mixture back on the stove to reduce it down to something resembling mashed potato.
He then put it all on a plate, with shaved fetta and rocket to garnish.

Boof's final dish consisted of a milo infused mashed potato with a lump of pancake mixed with avocado and potato, topped off with grated feta cheese and rocket. To be honest, the dish did look like someone had taken a shit, thrown up on it and then came all over it. But in saying that, it did encompass colour unlike Michal's dish and the appearance was surprisingly intriguing for clump of shit. Boof scored a 6 out of 10 for his Presentation. It was a mutual agreement that the creativity of this dish was phenomenal and he scored a 9 out of 10. Now, the interesting part... The pancake tasted pretty good, it was a nice mix of ingredients but the texture really let it down. The Milo Mashed Potatoes also had a strange texture, but one that was most welcoming to the palette. The taste of the potatoes however, confused both Boof and Michal. For taste, we believed that a 7 out of 10 was acceptable. This brings Boof's total for week one to 22.

Week one results

Michal - 24

Boof - 22

Week One (Michal)

First week of FoodRape 2010 and Michal was given the challenge of cooking a meal using Mi-Goreng, Vegie Burgers, 1 Apple, Pumpkin Cuppasoup and Canned Corn.

He decided to cook the Mi-Goreng as per usual and then added a quarter of a shredded apple and corn. He cooked 2 Veggie burgers as per normal on the pan and cooking oil. As a pumpkin style gravy, he used two packets of the Pumpkin Cuppasoup and mixed it with half a mug (yes he used a mug as a measuring utensil) of soy milk and a teaspoon of butter. Boiled it for a long period of time until it thickened. Just before serving, he added another quarter mug of soy milk and stirred it in till the sauce loosened up in consistency.

He then used the rest of the apple and attempted to caramelise the apple in a frying pan with sugar, butter and cooking oil. He had no idea how to camerlise but knew that it sounded fancy and involved some form of brandy. Because he does not own brandy... he decided that butter and cooking oil may do the trick. He added sugar to that and kept cooking until things began to smell. He served his applecrap with maple syrup in the hope that it would retain some flavour.

All up, Michal scored 8 out of 10 for Presentation because the dishes did not encompass any colour apart from brown and orange (diarrhoea central). He received 9/10 for creativity even thou he cooked the Mi-Goreng as per usual, the choice to add shredded apples to the noodles and also not to mention that the sauce made from soy milk and pumpkin Cuppasoup turned out to be edible, tasty and a nice touch to the meal. And finally, Michal received a 7/10 for taste. His desert was terrible..., but the noodles and Veggie burger with Pumpkin Cuppasoup Sauce were surprising in taste and no food poisoning has occured thus far.

All up, after the first week, Michal has scored 24/30. Therefore, his first week can be dubbed a success.

THE RULES

As FoodRape 2010 is such a prestigious competition, there are very strict rules.


Each week, each contestant buys five ingredients that the other contestant must use in their meal.
The budget for each contestant per week is AU$15.
All five ingredients much be used in each meal. The five ingredients are allowed to be spread over two courses. i.e., dinner and dessert.
Other ingredients may be used to compliment the five main ingredients, or to help in their cooking. Eg, sugar, oil, butter, etc.
The five ingredients must be somehow odd, or unusual.
Each contestant gets one "phone-a-friend" lifeline per meal.
Contestants are not allowed to look up recipes, or use the internet as a reference.




At the end, each meal is judged on presentation, creativity and taste. These are tallied into a score out of thirty.

INTRODUCTIONS

After a grueling selection process, two FoodRapists have been chosen for this prestigious competition.






Our first FoodRapist is Michal.



Michal is a 20-year-old male who hails from the 'hoods of Narre Warren. After a stint in Barwon Prison, he is ready to stop raping men and start Raping Food. Michal's favourite things include going to your local public toilet and writing offensive graffiti on the walls with his own faeces. He can usually be found watching MMA and drinking cement from his favourite mug. Michal is a vegetarian, as there are no animals brutal enough for him to eat.







Our second FoodRapist is Boof.



Boof is 21-years-old and from the wild mountains of Echuca. After a disastrous drunken rampage, Boof was run out of town. He lived off the land for 5 years, killing and eating tourists, before he settled in Geelong. Boof's favourite things include wearing animal skins and taunting the cheetahs at the zoo. Boof can usually be found in front of the television, wallowing in his own filth.